The Sorcerer's Moon
by Tasumi Ashiru
Summary: **Part 3 Now Up** SOme more .. mature love matter.. (eriol x Yue) details of Clows death, Involves suicide and cutting. Just your standard Yue + Eriol Shonen Ai fic revolving about Clow and Yue Shonen Ai.
1. Default Chapter

The Sorcerer's Moon   
By: Tasumi Ashiru   


AN: Shonen Ai elements (Yue x Clow/Yue x Eriol) 

Chapter one: A Tale of Tragic Love 

Yue sat back his silver hair pulled back into a braid. Pushing his bangs back he sat beside Sakura and Syaoran's daughter's bed, his wings arched over him lightly. 

"Uncle Yue, why are you always so sad." The little girl looked up at him and smiled. "You never smile. Yet you never say why." 

Yue straighten his back and glanced at her. "I have my reason's … it's a story about a guardian and their master who faded away… with out any reason." 

"But Uncle Yue, you were momma's guardian right?" the little girl sat up her pigtails bouncing on both sides of her head. 

"Not at first." Yue sat back and made himself comfortable before beginning the tale, modifying it for the little girl so she didn't have nightmares. "Once upon a time, there was a sorcerer. He was a kind spirit who loved everyone and everything. One day, he sat there gazing at his garden, his head resting in his hands as he sat there pondering the sun with all his life giving energy. 

It wasn't that the sorcerer hated the sun, he already created a being made of pure sunlight. This being was so filled with life that it nearly drove the sorcerer crazy. Unfortunately this being of the sun could not be a companion to the sorcerer. After all the being did not even resemble a human. 

One night seated outside, his cloaks wrapped around him, the sorcerer pondered at the moon. The moon was so beautiful that night. The lovely shades of purple and gray hung around the moon, making the moon seem nearly alive. 

Holding his hands together the sorcerer pouted wondering how to give the moon a human form. Would it be a strong male, or a gentle female, only he really knew. 

Taking out many sheets of paper the sorcerer began to write against them, death to the rumbling of an impending storm that was coming. As the clouds covered the pale moon the sorcerer pouted. Grabbing the sheets he ran indoors to avoid getting wet as the rain began to fall. 

Continuing in his room, he lit three candles and set them on top of the desk. Pulling his hair back he continued his work, writing against the sheets of crisp paper. 

By morning the sorcerer completed the spell and set out to create the being he pondered all night, his personality, the color of his eyes even his hair had been all determined by this sorcerer. 

The next night preparations were made for the creation of this being. Once the stage was set, the magic both flowing from the moon and from the sorcerer. The being was brought forth in a burst of glittering moon light. 

To say the being was beautiful would be an understatement. He had long silver hair and deep catlike eyes that were so intense that they showed more emotion than any human's eyes could. 

Night after night the sorcerer sat there reading or talking with his creations, his children if you will. Then one night the sorcerer never came. he was sitting in his chair starring at the moon, his hand clutching tightly at his chest. 

Something was wrong with him, something neither beings could explain. An hour latter, everything they accepted as their life faded away as if it was some cruel dream." 

"That's it?" Rayne sat up and looked at Yue, his wings shook lightly. "That wasn't happy, I wanted to hear a happy story." 

"I am sorry I don't have any." Yue stood up and tucked the little girl in before closing the door behind him after he left.   


Chapter two: Amongst Stars 

"Yue..." Keroberus looked up at the disheveled moon guardian. "I am glad you didn't tell her everything. Syaoran and Sakura would have a hard time explaining suicide and sex to a 5 year old." 

Yue frowned before walking past his 'brother'. "You would never understand it Keroberus. You would never once even picture how I felt with Clow." 

Keroberus followed him. "I wouldn't?" 

"No you couldn't." Yue closed his eyes. 

"Why not?" Kero licked his paw and smiled at his colder counter part. "Admittedly you and Clow had a deeper relationship. Something I never had… BUT DON'T YOU DARE ONCE THINK I NEVER CARED!" 

"You were so quick to accept Sakura." Yue frowned. "Everyone was. It was like no one ever cared about my feelings." 

"Yue you have been in this shell for 300 years. Clow has been dead for 300 years, move on. It isn't like he was the only person who ever made you happy." Keroberus shook his head looking at the pouting moon guardian. "You know I bet I can name one other person even lonelier than you." 

"I doubt that Keroberus." Yue looked up at the moon, his light silver hair reflecting the light perfectly. "I doubt anyone feels the way I do." 

"How about Eriol. Think about it, he went from Clow reincarnation to sharing powers with Sakura's father. He lost Ruby and Spinel. Do you think he is not suffering?" 

"He chose to share his powers." Yue spat out, even hearing Eriol's name made him shiver. 

"Did he choose to leave Kaho with her fiancée and live a lonely life looking at us with jealousy because Clow's creations survived, yet his died?" 

"Point taken he was not as great as Clow was." Yue retorted sarcastically. 

"If Clow was so great he wouldn't have killed himself." Keroberus looked at Yue with narrowly slit eyes. "You act like only you have suffered from his death! I suffered, the cards suffered, hell even the Li-clan suffered." 

"Clow was lonely. I should have loved him more, gave him more, made him laugh, took him flying. I should have told him!!" Yue slammed his fist against the tree they were seated under in the park. 

"Ahem." Eriol looked at the two of them, Yue who was ready to destroy the cherry blossom tree at the park and Keroberus who had gotten up. "Told who what?" 

"Just stay out of it Eriol." 

"Still angry Yue?" Eriol shrugged. 

"At you no, at myself yes." Yue frowned. 

"Move on Yue, do you think Clow wanted to see you like this for the past 300 years." 

"I want to know WHY!!" Yue clutched his hands at his sides, tears threatening to fall. 

"Why… It was nothing you did. I can answer that from my remaining memories. I, have... no Clow had always been suicidal. After that night you and him, shared some private memories. He regretted it, not the fact it was you, it was more what he did. He promised in your creation never to touch you that way, and when he did, it never sat right with him. The feeling of betrayal was too much for him. That night he killed himself hoping you would move on and forget him. How little did he know how far it would scar you." Eriol rubbed his hands together keeping them warm from the October air. "While Clow may have been great in many aspects of magic, he lacked one thing that pained him cause it could never come from any spell. He lacked inner strength. The same thing I lack. While I may not be Clow, I did inherit his qualities, his looks and his demeanor. You know that right Yue?" 

"Ummn humn." Yue nodded looking up at Eriol. 

"At times I wish I could be him, maybe then we could all see you happy." Eriol shrugged. "Of course I am not him, which hurts me because I am so much like him. I can't speak about him without fumbling with the words we or me." 

"Eriol…" His name slipped from his lips almost as gently as Clow's would have. "Now, I think I see what Keroberus meant about you suffering more than any of us." 

"I don't think I suffered Yue." Eriol smiled. "I think I loved being like him." 

"Did you?" Yue bent his head down. "Why?" 

"Because I got to see you two, my true magic, everything again. Don't once think I did not regret my actions when I killed myself. There is not a day that I live that I do not regret it with all my heart." Eriol shook his head. "See? I speak about him like we are one." 

Keroberus smiled. "Maybe you are. Maybe in the least your hearts are." 

Eriol turned away his long hair falling against his face. "I… I should just go." 

Yue looked up at Eriol who was shivering lightly. "Perhaps so... Would you like me to accompany you?" 

Eriol stood there for a moment. "If you would like." 

"I would like to." Yue got up holding his hands out to him. "Come on. It's faster flying." 

Keroberus watched with a grin as he saw Yue wrap his arms around Eriol's waist and lift him up, his large billowing wings spread out behind him. 

Just then Sakura walked by she was out for over half an hour looking for her guardians. "Where is Yue going." 

"Taking Eriol home." 

"Eriol was here?" 

"Hai, he and Yue were talking about Clow and the past and Yue offered to take him home. I don't think Yue will be home tonight." Kero walked past Sakura leaving her there thinking. 

Sakura thought for a minute. "Hoeeee!!"   
  


  



	2. 2

Chapter three: Dragons and Doves (Warning.. I think Yue is slightly OOC)   


Eriol sat back starring at Yue who was curled up by the fireplace, in the same house Clow used to own. "Yue?" 

Yue parted his gaze from the raging fire to face Eriol. Eriol was seated in the dark red chair, dressed in a black suit, around his neck was the now useless sun staff key. Shaking his head lightly, Yue straightened his wings. "Hai." 

"Are you just going to sit there starring at the fire?" Eriol swiped his bangs from his face and smiled at the moon guardian. 

"Am I not allowed to look at the fire?" Yue closed his eyes. "I think fire intrigues me. It gives large amounts of energy, but yet causes so much damage. It seems so happy dancing along the log, and then it moves along from kindling to long till it burns brightly. However, the fires beauty is short lived. In that aspect fire reminds me of Clow. He was so powerful and loving that when he realized that he gave into a mortal desire, he found it to be too much." 

"Is there not a thing in this world that does not remind you of Clow?" 

Yue blushed and turned his head away from Eriol, his gaze drawn right back to the fire. "I don't know. He is the only true love I have ever known." 

"How do you expect to find another, if you dwell on him?" Eriol pulled his glasses off and sat back in the chair closing his eyes. 

"Eriol, how did he die?" 

Eriol shook his head. "I really don't think you want to know how he died Yue. It was not a pretty death." 

"Death is never pretty." Yue looked over at Eriol his face which was normally so serene, now filled with sadness. 

"Yue... I really don't want to talk about it." 

"Okay." Yue closed his eyes and arched his wings against his body. "Did it hurt him?" 

"Of course." Eriol shook his head. "Yue, he slit his wrists. He made me swear never to tell you." Eriol held his wrists out, they were both marked with fading scars. "See. He bled for 2 hours before he drew in his last breath he was sitting there the book long since sat on the table, holding the knife in his hand he drew a faint slash making progressively deeper than the last. As his blood pooled on the wooden floor, he fell forward his soft black hair stained with traces of his blood." 

Yue knelt down along Eriol's side looking at the scars on his wrists. Taking his hand tightly, he bent his head down and pressed a light kiss against the scar. "I understand why it hurts so much. These scars are just as much yours as they are his." 

Eriol trembled at the close contact from the moon guardian. "I…" Eriol pulled his hand away from him. 

"Tell me you didn't try to?" Yue's face filled with concern. 

"I have lost everything. My guardians died, my fiancee ran off with a 16-year-old boy she's marrying, I have no true magic and I lost the respect of you and Keroberus by being so spiteful after Ruby and Spinel died." 

"You never lost my respect Eriol. It is hard to live up to be someone else. At times I think it was wrong for Clow to meddle in fate. Making you live up to his ideals and dreams was cruel. It gave you no chance to be Eriol only Clow Read's reincarnation." Yue knelt down in front of him and gazed up at him. "Honestly, I want to know about Eriol Hiiragizawa, Not Clow Read. I want to know what you think, not what Clow would have thought." 

"I am not important. I was supposed to make you smile not you try to cheer me up." 

"I am not the one who slit their wrists am I?" Yue closed his eyes. 

"No." Eriol sank back in the chair. 

"Tell me what I can do for you. What anyone can do to make you happy?" Yue lifted his wings up in to the air and looked up at him. 

"Give me a reason to live." 

"Because, Even though I looked at you while you were bitter towards us with anger. I never once hated you. Because I understand what it feels like to have lost everything. You forget one thing Eriol, Clow was my everything." Yue wrapped his arms around Eriol. 

"So you do understand?" Eriol closed his eyes. "Do you know why I followed so close after you?" 

"Because... You were lonely." Yue looked up at him quizzically. 

"No, Because all along even when I had to hurt you. I loved you. That is why Kaho left me, because one night I said your name instead of hers when she kissed me." 

Yue blushed faintly. "Perhaps, it is fate." 

"Perhaps." Eriol leaned forward, and pressed his lips to his forehead before cupping his chin in his hands and kissing him deeply.   



	3. 03

  
Chapter three: A Reason for Living   


"Eriol…" Yue's eyes widened as Eriol back away after the kiss. "Why?" 

"Like Keroberus said perhaps my heart has stayed the same after all these years." Eriol closed his eyes folding his hands in his lap. " I am sorry if I offended you." 

"No… Shocked. I thought you despised me." 

"Like I said that was my pain talking. Now I want something else to talk something that has stayed hidden for 2 long years." 

"What is that?" Yue closed his eyes and continued kneeling there on the carpet in front of Eriol. Unfolding his wings, Yue laid his head against Eriol's lap, his silver hair spilling out against his black pants. 

"My heart. You know how hard I have tried to keep it hidden, now I can't. Not from you anyway." Eriol ran his fingers through Yue's thick silver hair. "has any one ever told you how beautiful you are?" 

"Not since…" Yue's voice dropped as he closed his eyes. "I am sorry. I always mention him don't I?" 

"There is nothing to say you are sorry over Yue. You loved him." Eriol stroked his cheek gently gazing down at the guardian with eyes that were deeper than that of a 22-year-old. They told stories of the past, of masquerade balls, gardens, of moon lit nights, and of kisses in the summer rain. Eriol shook his head and his braid flopping from left to right against the old leather chair. "Yue, the say you only get one chance at life. After Spinel and Ruby Moon died, I thought it was the end of me." 'Again.' "I felt so lost that, I figured the only way out was death, freedom, but you came to me. You made me see again. Thank you." 

Yue nuzzled his cheek against his hand, almost purring lightly. "I did the same thing you would have done for me." 

'Even thought your true heart will always belong to him. Stay with me.' "So are you ready to get going?" Eriol looked up his eyes closing them lightly. 

"I was not planing on leaving, unless you want me too." Yue stood up fanning his hair and wings out behind himself. 

"No, I just figured your mistress would be worried." 

"She is a friend who I protect. Not a mistress, as was Clow not really my master." 'He was my heart.' 

'Was!?' Eriol shook his head realizing that he read Yue's mind. "Who holds your heart now?" 

Yue shrugged. "You." 

"Am I?!" Eriol sat back in his seat and opened his eyes looking to Yue. 

"Hai." Yue shook his head holding his hand out to Eriol. "Come on." 

"Where are we going?" Eriol took his hand. 

"Some where special to me." Yue held his hand tightly as he ran up into the circular room, where the old study used to be. "This is where I was made, this is also where my most private memory happened." Yue pulled him close. "This is also where I want to have my first private memory of you." 

Eriol shook his head. "Private?" 

Yue ran his long graceful fingers against his shoulders that were covered with the dark suit coat. Tilting his head to the side he blushed lightly. "Like what happened after I found Clow sitting out in the rain." 

Eriol closed his eyes as a hundred images hit him at once, each of them more explicit then the last. The final image made a whimper escape from his parted lips. "That night... was the last night you ever saw him. That was when you and him…" 

Yue let go of his hand, the small desk that was once in the room while Clow was alive was replaced with a dresser and a old bed, that was covered with soft cream colored satin and crimson trimmed pillows. "I want to share that memory with you, if I am allowed?" 

Eriol stood there, his heart was pounding in his ears as he looked up at Yue. "Are you sure you want to?" 

"As sure as the sunrise and the sunset." Yue touched the sleeve of the black suit coat, wishing silently that is was the robe he first saw him in with the radiating sun and made of soft black velvet. 

"Yue?" Eriol reached for his hand. "I wish I knew what you were thinking." 

"I wanted to see you in them robes now as an adult. Your hair down against your face and that smile you always had against your lips. I miss that." Yue clutched his hand tighter as he saw the light form around Eriol's body. 

In place of the suit was the old robe he used to wear. His hair that was normally in a braid feel unbound to his waist, closing his eyes he smiled, catching Yue's hand in his as he lifted it to his lips. "Now about that memory." 

Yue spun him around pushing him back against the satin covered bed. As they both fell Yue captured his lips in a soft gentle kiss, his fingers undoing the catches on the velvet robe. Pushing the robe of his shoulders, Yue pressed his pale lips against his neck flicking his tongue against his skin. 

Eriol moaned as his head lulled back against the satin pillow. Lifting his hands up, he began to remove the moon guardian's drape. Pushing it down against Yue's back his fingers only momentarily brushing against his bottom.   



End file.
